Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Issue #47 - The Secret

Issue #47 - The Secret

Good day gents! Today's issue is about something i feel needs to be brought to light again, but this time a little more in depth. Today's issue is on how to instantly be more attractive. Easily, and for free. It's so simple, you would think more people would understand it, but in reality there are so many people that just don't realize how easy it really is. Forgive me ahead of time, this issue will seem a little bit introspective, but really i think it's a very important point that a man needs to understand and master if he truly will understand what style is all about.

The secret, gentlemen, is Confidence. That's it. It's the root of all style, and all attraction. It's the single most important tool you can possess, and is more powerful than we fully realize. Women instantly recognize it, and you will notice how quickly you feel completely different, and embrace it.

So where do we start? Well i can't very well ask you to feel instantly confident if you don't have it already in you. That wouldn't be fair. Each man is different, and each man has different factors in his life which contribute to his confidence, or subtract from it. I'm not a psychologist, and I am not about to get into all the tiny things you can do to create a confident self. SO, instead i have decided to give you some very easy and effective techniques to depict wear a mask, if you will. Hopefully if you take my words to heart, and apply these tools, you will actually build real confidence within you, and be able to reach a level of style you never knew you could find. So what's first?

EYE CONTACT - This is massive, and is the number-one-first-and-foremost important aspect to confidence. Eye contact not only establishes contact, but the eyes are also very intimate. Think about it: you meet an attractive woman at the bar, and after just enough liquid courage, you walk over to say hello...what do you think is more attractive to her? Looking around the bar and at your shoes, or looking her dead in the eye and saying hello? Eye contact establishes confidence right out of the gate, and with enough practice, you can deliver messages with your eyes that she doesn't even know she's receiving. This is huge guys, and if you're too shy to even maintain eye contact for 5 seconds, then you're beyond my help sir. This is the first skill to learn. It doesn't matter if you're completely void of confidence, suck it up, look her in the eyes, and you have your foot in the door.

KNOW YOURSELF - What makes you happy? what 'pumps you up'? what makes you feel on top of the world? Think about that. Walk with that thought in your brain. Carry yourself as if you're untouchable. It may sound stupid, but it does wonders not only for your own confidence, but how you are perceived by everyone around you.

BODY LANGUAGE - This goes hand in hand with the above tactic. Once you have found that 'zone' that makes you happy and feel invincible, focus on your body language. Square your shoulders, keep your chin up (but not in the air like you're a snob or trying to hide a bald spot). Walk confidently, shake hands with conviction. These are all small details that all add up to, or at least the perception of, confidence. Think of it as saving your money for something you really want; even though you may only be placing in a couple dollars at a time, every little bit helps. Combine your body language with sustained eye contact, and you sir, are on the road to success.

JUST BE YOURSELF - Forget the bullshit you see on tv. Ignore the chick flicks and the stuff you've read in your last girlfriend's cosmo. Ignore all the stuff you think you should say or do, and just be yourself. And for the love of all the women in the world, do NOT, under any circumstances use a lame pickup line. It's not hard guys, JUST BE YOU. Women are not some sort of mythical goddesses that you need to prove yourself to in order to receive some magical passport to a wonderful land full of unicorns and forbidden fruit. They're humans like you are. They feel nervous, they are shy, they are all the things that you are (except maybe not as hairy or gassy), so remember that it's most likely they are feeling all the same stuff you are. Relax.

ADMIT FAULTS - This is going to be a hard one for a lot of guys to do, but it works. it shows that you are secure with yourself (even if you're not), and makes you much less intimidating, and defuses the whole situation. What i mean is, if you stutter, or are at a loss of words, or are feeling overwhelmingly nervous, then do something unheard of: Admit it. Saying something as simple as "wow, sorry i am nervous" has more power than you even realize. It immediately makes the situation more comfortable. The fact that you can admit your nervousness can allow her to either admit her own, or find it very cute that you admitted yours, or both. So swallow your pride, since the secure and open man is much more attractive to women than the close off tough guy. And if she prefers the closed off tough guy, then you can walk away, since she has some growing up to do.

Guys, that's about it. I can't tell you how to BE confident in yourself, but with these tips, hopefully you will get a good enough response to boost your confidence to where these all become second nature to you.  I've said it many times, but i will say it again, STYLE is not all about the clothes you wear. It's about YOU, and how you carry yourself in every way. You can wear everything the magazines tell you to, but if you're not confident in yourself, then you're just wearing clothes.

Until next time gents, stay classy

Monday, October 3, 2011

Issue # 46 - The little things

Issue # 46 - The little things

Hello there gentlemen! How are we this fine october day? I'm well, and i hope you are too. Now that the weather is a bit colder, and the styles are a bit more layered, intricate and put together, it's important to remember the tiny details of your look, as these are the most important details. It's the little things that can keep you just shy of looking fantastic. Sometimes these are so easy to overlook or completely forget about, but it can really make a massive difference. Some of them i have mentioned in past blogs, others i haven't, but they are all important, so check it out!!

1 - Proportion, Proportion, Proportion

Did i mention it's all about proportion? When you see a photo of someone dressed to the nines, something your subconscious notices is that everything is in proportion. Not only are they dressed to their body type (ie, long torso, short legs, etc), but all the details of their look are proportioned. One of the BIGGEST mistakes i see today is the miscommunication of tie to lapel. There are guys with big fat jacket lapels wearing super rockstar skinny ties, and guys with super skinny hipster lapels, with big giant 1980s power ties. THIS DOESN'T WORK. The rule of thumb is that the width of your tie at the widest point should mirror the width of your lapel at the widest point. This of course, like everything can be adjusted to your personal style, but for the most part it's something not to shy away from. Now, i am on a budget just like you are, so instead of spending ridiculous money on a bunch of jackets and a bunch of ties, just try to remember to put thinner ties with thinner lapels, and visa versa. No one will break out the ruler to make sure, but your look will immediately seem more put together.

The proportion detail also goes for every other part of your look. Longer winter jacket? Clip it between just below the waist and haf way down your thigh. Don't let it touch your knee, or it will look far too long. Wearing skinny jeans? use a top or jacket that is equally proportional, or you will end up looking like a Milli Vanilli wannabe. It's ALL about proportion.

2 - NO detail is too small.

There is nothing that should be overlooked in your look, ESPECIALLY if it's a formal or special occasion where looking good is very important. Gents, I am talking about the very tiny, minute details that are often overlooked; Wearing a tie? make sure the back of your collar is pulled tight and crisp, and be SURE it covers the tie. A little bit of tie poking out the bottom, no matter how little, can take the shine off your look in an instant. Wearing a tie bar? be sure you have one that fits your tie. They come in all sizes, for all sizes of ties, so use a small one for skinny ties, etc. and try to always ensure it's perfectly straight. A little bit of moving around throughout the night is obviously going to happen, but for pictures, and the beginning of the night, be sure it's straight as an arrow, to get that polished look you're trying to get. Showing some ankle? Then make sure your socks are perfect. If you're matching socks to pants, be sure they aren't faded more than your pants or it will look odd. Doing the coloured sock pop? Then be sure the colours work with what you're wearing and aren't just shock value.

I know these may seem trivial, but there is a lot to be said about nailing the small details. They may be tiny little things, but when all put together, they make the total difference in how you look, how you are perceived and how you carry yourself.

3- Back to BASICS

Guys, the majority of the little things can be covered right off the bat if you just remember the basics. Things every man should know and have in his style arsenal: Ties should run button to button. That means from your top collar button to the button on your pants. Your tie should NEVER exceed past your belt line. If it does, it's too long. You can toy around with making it shorter, but be cautious, it's a style that can be hard to pull off. Wearing black pants and black shoes? then NEVER wear white socks. It doesn't look good. period. As i write this, i am sitting behind a gentleman wearing a full black outfit, and very blatantly obvious white sweat socks (with gray heels and toes it would seem). This should never happen. ever. don't even think it. Having a pop of colour in your socks is encouraged, but white is a no-no. You know this guys. These are all basics.

If you pay attention to the little details guys, you should have no problem looking perfectly put together every time. One more thing, and this is exremely important: Please try your best to show your underwear as little as possible. It really doesn't look cool. Pull your pants up and be a big boy ok? Thanks.

Until next time,