Issue # 1 - Fast Food Fashion

issue # 1

FAST-FOOD-FASHION

In this first installment, I would like to address the overwhelming amount of men who think that Summer is a 3 month-long excuse to dress like slobs. It's as if the heat and the sun speak in a languange only men can understand, and tell them that Cargo shorts and thong sandals (or "flip-flops") are the only attire they can wear, for ALL occasions. This, gentlemen, is incredibly wrong...in so many ways.

Now, since i know in many cities that are NOT a metropolis, the selection of clothing, especially for a man in his mid-late twenties is decently limited. We are stuck with what i like to call "Fast Food Fashion". This is a term i developed for all the stores that carry almost identical ideals of style. (ie/ Bluenotes, Bootlegger, Campus Crew, American Eagle, Gap, etc)...these are the fast food restaurants of style; offering quick choices for the shopper who does not want to be inconvenienced by taking the time to really create their own style....and in similar fast food remorse, the buyer ends up with a sense of remorse, self loathing, and disappointment over their purchase. "Hmm, i will have the cargo shorts and polo shirt combo please"..."would you like a pair of flip flops with that?" "...umm, yeah why not. Can i have a backwards hat with that as well?"....tragic.

Listen guys, Cargo shorts are fine...for Around the house, casual BBQs, yard work, or running to Canadian Tire or Home Depot on a hot sweaty day. But when that sun sets and you decide to go out on the town, please....for your own good, put the shorts away...or at the very least, opt for a pair of more slim cut, shorter shorts, designed for less casual occasions. Shorts do NOT need to be below your knees. Are you 10 years old? or are you a man? Showing a little leg is no longer cause for outcast from your circle of friends as it was when you were in grade 6. Wearing fitted, tailored shorts says "Hey, i am a grown up. I do grown up things...and no i do not want to do a keg stand". Dress like a man, not a frat boy.

Now don't get me wrong. As stated above, cargo shorts are acceptable for those certain occasions where fashion can go out the window. For example, if you are heading to an all day outdoor party where you INTEND on doing keg stands and drinking until you pass out, then more power to you. (these occasions, as you approach mid-late twenties, should become fewer and MUCH further in between...otherwise you become THAT guy who still thinks he's 18).

This leads me into the second portion of your fast food fiesta....the POLO SHIRT. We'll make this one very simple. Unless it's a well-fitting, tailored polo shirt that's either a SOLID COLOUR, or with MINIMAL design accents, DON'T WEAR IT. Period. If you want to wear a polo shirt, put some time and effort into it, and find one that works well for you. It should be tailored and fitted. The way golfers used to wear them in the 50s and 60s. It should NOT be 2 sizes too big, the sleeves should not extend past your elbows, and there shouldn't be 18 colours of 6" wide stripes on it. The golf shirt should be clean, simple and classic. For the man of a limited budget, H&M for men carries some excellent golf shirts, and if you are looking for the perfect fit, Lacoste has them. A little more money, and you'll actually have to spend some time (gasp!) to get them, but it will be worth it. Oh, one more thing...do NOT pop the collar. I repeat, DO NOT POP THE COLLAR.

The third portion is the ever cringe-worthy flip flop, or thong sandal. I can't believe i am wasting my time writing about them, since it should go without saying that these are NOT to be worn out. What are you thinking? Footwear and Jackets are 2 things that should be deeply considered when dressing to go out. Look at them as a guys' version of accessories. We don't have necklaces and bracelets and hair pieces and a million other things, but we DO have shoes and jackets, which can pull a style together, or completely detroy it. Gentlemen, the flip flop is a breaker. In 2 simple syllables, they say "i don't care about how i look" or "i am far too lazy to try to look good". I know they are comfortable for you (for me, not so much...they are more work if you ask my opinion)...but for your own sake, and everyone elses' please don't wear them.

It truly astounds me how many guys wear the above 3 items together (60% of them include a ball cap of some sort, 30% opt for an Aeropostale t shirt instead of a polo, and the remaining 10% wear both together). So if you've read this far and are truly interested in changing this, the answer is as simple as not eating fast food. Instead of hitting the drive thru for your meal, go to a grocery store, get some fresh ingredients and MAKE YOUR OWN FOOD. I am not saying Make your own CLOTHING, but make your own STYLE. Stop settling for the crap on the displays at the malls, and look deeper...find things that may not be in your face, but are still very stylish and classic. Want to wear shorts? Opt for a slimmer fit and cut than the cargo shorts, and it will change your entire look. Get a more fitted golf shirt or go for a classic (and my favourite), the v-neck white t shirt. It never goes out of style. Want to dress it up a bit? Go for a light colour button down with a very slight checker pattern or solid colour. No darks if you can avoid it. No idea what to wear on your feet? A pair of light canvas slip ons or leather loafer-style shoes will go a long way....with NO socks...please, no socks.

Want a total change? You can adopt my style (which is Europe's style) of not wearing shorts as much as possible, if at all. Not only will that immediately set you apart from the rest of the cargo-wearing bunch, but covering your skin from the sun and heat actually keeps you cooler than exposing your skin, so it's a win-win. Jeans will always work, as will fitted cotton khakis, or even light linen pants. And hey, skip the ball cap, and go for a straw fedora or even a newsboy cap. They both go a long way in making you look a lot more clean and polished than your cargo shorts and polo. And trust me...girls will notice that you've cleaned up.

Hope this helped...and i hope to see fewer cargo shorts in the future.

Sincerely

S.G.